When my boyfriend requested to maneuver in with me in 2017, I stated no. We might been courting for a yr, and each of our New York Metropolis leases have been about to run out. We might save a lot cash if we lived in only one place, he stated. However I panicked.
Our lives felt so boring. We have been on observe to comply with the normal relationship playbook. Subsequent we would get married, then we would have children, and earlier than we knew it, our iron-clad routines would information us straight to a retirement dwelling.
As a substitute, I argued, we must always do one thing completely different. We bought 90% of our belongings, saved the remainder in his dad and mom’ basement, and moved to a brand new metropolis each month (typically staying longer and sometimes repeating a vacation spot).
For 2 years, we discovered short-term leases via Craigslist, Fb teams, and Airbnb. We lived in 10 cities whole, together with Chicago, Denver, Los Angeles, and Austin.
Now we’re again in Brooklyn. We’re married and have a daughter. However the classes we took from this journey nonetheless encourage how we stay at present.
We realized what actually issues
I all the time positioned sentimental worth on my stuff. It was laborious for me to offer away garments that now not match or eliminate books, letters, and different keepsakes. However so as to journey across the nation simply, we every introduced only one checked bag and one carry-on suitcase.
We packed up gadgets like winter coats and household memorabilia and left them with my husband’s dad and mom. The remainder of our stuff we donated, tossed, or bought.
Jen Glantz and her husband in Austin.
Courtesy of Jen Glantz
It was laborious within the second to say goodbye to a lot. Once in a while, I needed I nonetheless had an merchandise or two of clothes that I gave away or a stack of birthday playing cards I would tossed. However these emotions light quick.
After we moved again to Brooklyn to begin a household, I turned an ultra-minimalist. I not often purchased new issues and located myself cleansing out closets and drawers a couple of instances a month to verify we weren’t holding on to issues for no purpose. The much less stuff I crowd my house with, the higher I really feel.
We needed to shake up our routines
Earlier than we did this, we walked the identical path dwelling daily from work, ate on the similar locations on rotation, and alternated between two or three weekend actions.
However after we began dwelling in new locations, we did not have an opportunity to type routines. We have been so wanting to see as a lot as we may that we purposely by no means walked or drove the identical path to get to locations, and we made a rule that we could not eat at any restaurant greater than twice.
At first, it was uncomfortable. Nevertheless it compelled us to attempt new issues, from browsing to happening a date at a state truthful.
Whereas that is more durable to implement every day now, we create seasonal bucket lists of issues we wish to do in New York Metropolis, plan a novel date evening each month, and change up our weekend dinner spots.
We discovered to stay on much less
Whereas it’d seem to be a financially irresponsible resolution to ditch your house and journey everywhere in the nation, we truly saved cash alongside the best way. In New York, we have been each paying for our separate dwelling areas. Plus, our month-to-month bills included health club memberships, impulse buys, and extra.
Jen Glanz and her husband in Chicago.
Courtesy of Jen Glantz
After we traveled, we shopped much less. We did not have house for brand spanking new clothes or knickknacks, and located low-cost leases that we shared.
We invested more cash in mutual funds and within the inventory market in order that after we lastly moved again to Brooklyn, we have been in a position to afford hire on a one-bedroom condominium that in any other case would’ve been out of our value vary.
By that point, we have been used to dwelling with much less, and we began following a price range that helped us proceed to save lots of.
We actually get to know one another (and ourselves) very well
I had solely recognized my now-husband for a yr after we determined to go on this journey collectively. We every knew the model of the opposite that had longstanding routines in a well-recognized metropolis.
As soon as we began transferring round, we acquired to know completely different sides of one another. For the primary time, we handled the stress and challenges of navigating a brand new metropolis, determining the place to stay, and never understanding anyone else there.
We needed to discover methods to construct our personal lives in these new locations. We might take up particular person hobbies, go to our separate business occasions, and plan one solo evening out every week in order that we may come again and discuss in regards to the completely different experiences we had.
Not solely did this make our relationship stronger, however it additionally deepened our sense of self. I began to really feel extra like me once more, the particular person I used to be earlier than I acquired misplaced in working my 9-to-5 and dwelling the identical day time and again. It helped me discover and embrace journey.
Though we’re comfortable in Brooklyn with our two-year-old daughter, that is one thing we’ll undoubtedly do once more along with her earlier than she turns 18.
Jen Glantz is the founding father of Bridesmaid for Rent, the writer of “Lastly the Bride: Discovering Love after Strolling down Everybody Else’s Aisle,” and the creator of The Decide-Me-Up publication. Comply with her adventures on Instagram @jenglantz.
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